when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize