is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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