this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
