on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
