i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
false alarm, still single
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
