you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry