I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
