i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Randomize
