My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
