it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
This house was built for laser tag.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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