I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
