Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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