What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Randomize