Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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