hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
