5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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