wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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