Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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