operation harelip BJ is a go
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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