Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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