why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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