yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
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I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
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I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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