Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink