you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
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