We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
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We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
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My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize