If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Randomize
