PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
no. you can't hotbox the world.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
You have to summon your inner elephant
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
