French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
