: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
You left your phone here
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