Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
