Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize