what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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