I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
