Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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