and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
