I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
