we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
