Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
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