Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
