I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
