It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
