At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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