I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
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He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
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the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
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