Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize
