I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
