think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
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