I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
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You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
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She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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