fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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