at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I would fuck him just for his dog
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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