please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Can I color on your dick again?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
