I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
