We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
